30th Sunday in Ordinary Time, Year A
Preached at the Church of the Assumption in Bellingham, WA
Recording
https://moorejesus.podbean.com/e/loving-with-the-most/
Transcript
Thank you to J.Y. for edited the transcript.
In a country so shaped by Christianity—and particularly with so many of us growing up in a Christian Church—I should hope that these two commandments are not a surprise to anybody. They are foundational, essential to Christianity: love God and love neighbor. This is the foundation of everything else that we do. But when something is so foundational, it is very easy to become numb to it, to assume, yeah, I know what that means, and to live that out for decades without going back to it, thinking critically about it, seeing it with fresh eyes, or receiving it as a fresh challenge.
Thankfully today we have the first reading. The way it works during Ordinary Time is we pick up a Gospel—this year it’s Matthew—and we go through it in order. Then every Sunday, the Church picks a first reading from the Old Testament that matches the Gospel, that shows how the Gospel is a fulfillment of the Old Testament, and how in the Old Testament you can see prefigured the Gospel. They interpret each other. So, what does our Old Testament passage say today? Thus says the Lord: You shall not molest or oppress an alien, for you were once aliens yourselves in the land of Egypt. You shall not wrong any widow or orphan. And then He kind of gives a threat that ends with: Then your own wives will be widows and your children orphans. The interpretive key here is, that to understand what it means to love our neighbor as ourself we have to remember that we ourselves either were or could be in their situation. Do not oppress the alien because you yourselves were aliens. Do not molest the widow or the orphan because your own wives and children could easily become widows and orphans. What does it mean to love our neighbor as ourselves? The first way to enter that question is to ask: What would it be like to be in that situation? What would I hope for from those around me? What would I need from those around me?
One very present example for me as we think about aliens, widows and orphans is a situation that has sort of consumed my last eight days. Imagine that you are dealing with domestic violence, that the father of your children has become, or has always been, physically violent against you. You have taken him to court multiple times and the courts have not protected you. And then let’s say that violence is turned on your children. You are fleeing somebody who is functionally a violent stalker. Well, this happened this week. There was a family, a mom and three teenage kids who showed up on our doorstep here fleeing from Germany. The German courts had not helped them in any way, and so they fled to Canada. They arrived at the Vancouver airport and realized they didn’t have enough money to live off of until their court date. So, they were functionally homeless in Canada. They fled to the US to try their luck here, and on the way, they were robbed. They were fleeced of €6,000 and a cell phone, which was unlocked and gave this person access to all of their financial information. They ended up in Blaine with nowhere to go and nothing to rely on—they shut down their bank accounts to protect themselves—and then they end up here in Bellingham. Again, what does it mean to love our neighbor? If you were in that situation, what would you need? Well, you would need somebody to explain what’s going on in this new country, to explain where to find help. As a priest, I find I have to turn a lot of people away. There are problems that I can’t solve, particularly if somebody is lost in schizophrenia, if they are dealing with a manic bipolar episode, if they have substance abuse issues, if they’re a victim of long-term economic issues (which is to say they need a long-term affordable housing). Those problems are so big. We need mental hospitals; we need substance abuse detox centers; we need affordable housing. But on that day a week ago Saturday, it was a culmination of all of my conversations with the Lord about a great many things, and I decided I needed to take personal responsibility for this family. And so, I asked, what can I offer? Well, I can offer time, and I can offer expertise. I can fulfill the need that they have and explain the systems, to get them linked in with the social services, to take them to Opportunity Council. But to accomplish that, I needed time. I could only pay for a hotel room for a certain number of days. Blessedly, we have a couple here in the parish who have a mother-in-law suite that they have opened up in emergency situations before, so I called them, and they stepped up. They said, okay, we can provide housing for a couple of months while you try to work this out. And I said, good enough; I’ll take three months over three days. That’s fantastic. I also needed transportation. How do I get them to this hotel? How do I get them to the temporary housing? Well, blessedly, on their way down to Bellingham, they met a WTA driver who spoke German, their language, who also decided he needed to take personal responsibility for this family. He and his wife have stepped up with their pickup truck to transport four people, four suitcases that contain all of their worldly goods, and their dog to all of these places. I couldn’t have done that myself. These are people asking, okay, what’s the need? If I were in that situation, what would I need and what can I give? Again, with this standard, love your neighbor as yourself, we wouldn’t want somebody to give the least that they could; we would want somebody to give the most that they could. If we put ourselves in that situation and ask what’s the most that I can give, we all come to different answers. I couldn’t provide the housing. If a priest were to house a minor in his rectory, in this day and age, I would be shooed out of the priesthood instantly. But somebody else could offer housing. I can offer time and expertise. Somebody else can offer transportation. They are asking, what’s the most I can give in this situation?
Think about the widows. On Friday, I was at the fundraiser for the Whatcom County Pregnancy Clinic, and they mentioned that they are buying a new building four blocks from our Church. We are the second closest Church to them now. Imagine the people that they serve; these are today’s widows. There are women in emergency pregnancy situations. A lot of times when I talk to women who have sought abortion, they say it’s because they didn’t have any support. The boyfriend or sometimes the husband will say, I won’t support you. If you have this child, I’m going to cut you off. You’re going to have to find someplace else to live. Our relationship is over. Or if it’s a younger woman—this happens less today, but it still happens—her parents might say, well, if you have this kid, you don’t have a future, and I’m not going to financially support you for the rest of your life. You have to take care of this problem, otherwise you can’t be in our house anymore. Modern day widows, women without support. So, if you are in that situation, what are the things that you need? Put yourself in that situation. What are you hoping somebody will do for you? Well, the most important thing is that somebody says, “There’s another way. If the people around you won’t support you, I will support you.” A lot of times that starts outside Planned Parenthood with 40 Days for Life—somebody with compassion saying, “There is another way. If you want support, it’s here, we will support you.” And then you’ve got to follow up with details. The Whatcom County Pregnancy Clinic makes sure a woman gets through pregnancy safely with the medical care that she needs connected to doctors and nurses. They are going to be four blocks from us. Will we step up? Is there more that we can give to support that ministry? We’re only seven blocks from Planned Parenthood. Can we send more people to 40 Days for Life and then the follow through? As the kid grows up, they need diapers. They need support. Our Prepares ministry helps with that need. What do these women need, and what’s the most we can give them?
Or think about modern-day orphans in the foster care system. My stepsister has fostered two daughters for the last five years. A lot of times today, the reason a kid ends up in foster care is because their parents can’t take care of them. In the case of my stepsister, the parents are both substance addicted, and they cannot take care of their kids while they’re addicted—I think it’s meth that’s a problem now. Rightly or wrongly, the state says the best place for kids is with their parents. And so, for five years, my stepsister has brought these girls into her home, raising them like her own daughters, but not knowing whether they will continue in her household or whether their parents will get their lives together and the kids will move back with them. Incredible generosity for five years, just not knowing, but hoping that she can take care of these girls for the rest of their lives. What do these modern-day orphans need? What would be the most that we could give them?
Now you’ll notice a lot of these situations have to do with housing. This alien family that I’m working with…couldn’t have done it without a parishioner stepping up and offering housing. With the Whatcom County Pregnancy Clinic, they just announced on Friday they have this new program pairing with churches to look for rooms for women who have been kicked out of their homes because they are pregnant and want to have the child. Where can this woman stay while she gets back on her feet? Do people have rooms they are willing to offer for foster care, providing a home to a child? I understand not all of us can offer housing, but I think some of us might be able to. Some of us might have mother-in-law suites for families on the run, or might have an extra bedroom for a pregnant woman and be willing to open our homes. Some of us might be willing to foster children.
But again, the question here is what is the most that I can offer in my circumstances? Again, I couldn’t offer housing; I have to set boundaries. We all do. But to love my neighbor I have to ask these questions. How much money am I willing to spend on hotel rooms and groceries? How much can I afford to do in my circumstances? What would be the most you could give to somebody if they came to you in need? Maybe you don’t have the money, but maybe you have the time and the expertise. Maybe you can say, if somebody came to me, I would walk them through the Opportunity Council process. I would connect them with the domestic violence center or social services. Maybe you can offer that. The question begins with what would I want in that circumstance? And ends with what can I give in that circumstance? What’s the most that I have available? I should also say, not all of us are daily confronted with aliens, widows, and orphans. Sometimes we are asking, what is the most I can give to this co-worker who is mourning? What’s the most that I can give to my brother or sister who’s having a hard time? What’s the most that I can do for my parents who are aging? Or my kid who just hasn’t quite gotten things together yet? What’s the most I can do for this person I met at the grocery store who doesn’t need housing, but might just need a helping word? What’s the most that I can give them?
Now a final note. These commandments from the Lord come in order. Love God and then love neighbor. Why? Well, there are a lot of reasons we can talk about. God is our Creator, and we owe Him the most. But for today, I would say this love of neighbor is a contested notion. A lot of people disagree on what love means. For some people, it’s a feeling. For some people, it’s romantic. Only for Christians, it is asking what’s the thing that the person in front of me needs? That’s love. But we don’t know the needs of people until we know their Creator. I had friends in college who believed that the most loving thing to do with a crisis pregnancy would be to fight against those 40 Days for Life people—who they believed were obviously horrible, unloving people—and to escort these women into the pregnancy clinic so that they can deal with their problem. Now, from a certain perspective, you can see why they would think that’s the most loving thing to do. But God purifies our notion of love. We have to know Him, otherwise, we are likely to act in a zealous way that we think is loving, but is not the true love of the Lord. The same would be true for the people that I feel very unable to help—those who are in a mental health crisis, who have substance addiction issues, who are victims of a long-term economic disparity. I can’t give them housing, and a lot of times what they need is not what they want. Involuntary commitment is necessary, but it’s involuntary because that’s not what somebody wants. It is what they need. We have to know what somebody needs through the lens of the love of God. And then we can ask, what can I do to address those needs? What is the most I can give to address those needs? My brothers and sisters in Christ, there’s a phrase that I think would all be healthy for us to go back to: but by the grace of God go I. Any of us can end up in difficult situations. Putting ourselves in that mindset helps us better love our neighbor because we have to love our neighbor as ourselves. If I were there, what would I hope for? What would I need? And if I’m not there, what’s the most that I can give to help those who are?
Fr. Moore 